Destin or Wilmington?

Destin has the better beach by some way. The white quartz sand and clear green water of Okaloosa Island, Henderson Beach and Miramar run right along the town, the Gulf is usually gentle, and Crab Island adds shallow wading on the bay side. The sea is also a degree or two warmer at its peak.

Wilmington's beaches are good but sit apart from the city. Wrightsville, Carolina Beach and Kure Beach each lie a drive from downtown, and parking is hard to find on summer weekends. Wrightsville is the most polished of the three. Both coasts have dangerous rip currents on rough days, so watch the flags in either.

Both towns eat mainly from the sea and neither is a reason to travel, but Wilmington has a little more range. Alongside shrimp, flounder and oysters it has eastern North Carolina's whole-hog barbecue, modern Southern cooking in downtown's brick buildings and a strong craft brewery scene.

Destin's strength is its harbour, where snapper, grouper and royal red shrimp come straight off the charter boats and some kitchens will cook your own catch. Away from the docks the coast highway is mostly chains, and the more ambitious cooking is out along 30A.

Here Wilmington is far ahead. Its historic district of antebellum and Victorian houses under live oaks, the Bellamy Mansion, the Burgwin-Wright House, the Cotton Exchange and the Battleship North Carolina across the river give you two or three days of real sightseeing.

Destin grew out of a fishing village and kept almost none of it. A small fishing museum, the prehistoric temple mound in Fort Walton Beach and the military aircraft beside the air base are about all there is, so for history you have to drive to Pensacola.

Neither town has a club scene, and evenings out are casual in both, so the difference is where and when. Destin does its drinking on the water: decks along the harbour boardwalk, beach bars on Okaloosa Island and afternoon boat parties at Crab Island, with frozen drinks and a few late dance floors in summer and spring break.

In Wilmington, nights out centre on Front Street downtown. University students keep the pubs and rooftop terraces busy at weekends, so there is some life outside the beach season.

Both are flat, watery coasts with no hills, so the outdoors means boats, paddles and fishing rods. Destin looks out to the open Gulf, where deep-sea charters reach big game fish quickly. Dolphins swim in the pass, you can snorkel along the jetties, and the state parks to the east have rare coastal dune lakes.

Wilmington's nature is quieter and wilder. Tidal creeks, salt marsh and the undeveloped Masonboro Island are good for kayaking and birdwatching, and Wrightsville has surf. In Carolina Beach State Park, Venus flytraps grow wild, in the only corner of the world where they do.

Each town has two or three good outings and not much beyond them. From Destin you can go about forty minutes east to the planned pastel towns of 30A, such as Seaside and Rosemary Beach. An hour west, Pensacola has a colonial-era district, a naval aviation museum and brick forts.

Wilmington's best day runs south to Southport and the ferry to car-free Bald Head Island, passing the Fort Fisher earthworks and the ruins of Brunswick Town. New Bern and Beaufort are further off. Wilmington's outings lean towards old small towns, while Destin's mix planned modern towns with one historic city.

Destin is the more complete family resort. The calm, clear water suits small children, condos with pools make long stays easy, and the marine park, water park, go-karts and harbour cruises fill the days away from the sand.

Wilmington works well too, with old-fashioned rides on the Carolina Beach boardwalk, the aquarium at Fort Fisher, the Children's Museum and the decks of the battleship. But it has less made just for children, and everything is a drive. Summer heat and rip currents need watching in both.

Neither is easy without a car, but Wilmington has the advantage of a real centre. Its downtown and historic district are compact and flat and joined by the riverwalk, so you can park once and spend the day on foot. The beaches still mean driving.

Destin is strung out along one congested coastal highway with few safe crossings, so almost every trip is by car, ride-hailing or resort shuttle. The harbour boardwalk and the bike trail along 30A are the main exceptions.

Destin has more to buy, mostly of the mainstream kind. A large outlet centre near Miramar Beach and an open-air mall cover the chain stores, and the 30A towns add stylish boutiques, galleries and home-décor shops.

Wilmington's shopping is smaller and more independent, with bookshops, antique dealers and galleries along Front Street and in the Cotton Exchange. For chain stores, people go to the suburbs. Neither town has luxury shopping or crafts worth seeking out.

Wilmington is easier on the budget, though neither is cheap. Its city hotels are reasonable off season and casual seafood and barbecue are fair value. Destin's beachfront condos and waterfront restaurants charge resort-coast prices right through the warm months.

Both get more expensive in high summer, and in both you will need to hire a car. In Destin, you save by going off season or renting a condo with a kitchen inland or on the bay. In Wilmington, a room in the city out of season costs much less than a beachfront stay in summer.

Wilmington has a real performing arts scene for its size. Thalian Hall, a restored 19th-century opera house, stages theatre and touring shows, and there is also a larger arts centre and a community symphony. In the warmer months there are concerts by Greenfield Lake and long-running jazz and blues festivals.

In Destin, live entertainment mostly means cover bands on bar decks. The regional symphony plays across the bay in Niceville, and the 30A towns add small theatre companies and summer concerts on the lawns.

Neither town has a bathing tradition, so relaxing comes down to spas and the pace of the place. In Destin, the spas are mostly in the big golf and beach resorts at Sandestin and Miramar Beach. The calm is found on empty beaches early in the morning in spring and autumn.

Wilmington has smaller day spas and yoga studios, but the town itself moves slowly. Quiet evenings on the riverfront are easy to find except on summer weekends.