Myrtle Beach or Wilmington?

Myrtle Beach comes out ahead because the sand is right there. The Grand Strand runs for about 100km, and you can step from your hotel onto it. The surf is small and the shallows are long, so it is ideal for children. If you want more peace than the central blocks offer, the dune-backed beaches of Surfside, Garden City and Huntington Beach State Park are nearby.

Wilmington's beaches are good but sit a drive away from the city. You get the polished barrier island of Wrightsville, Carolina Beach with its boardwalk, and quieter Kure Beach. The water is cleaner than the greenish Grand Strand, but rip currents and summer parking take some of the ease out of a beach day.

Wilmington eats better. Its downtown has modern Southern restaurants in old brick buildings, there are raw bars along the river, eastern North Carolina whole-hog barbecue is part of the local tradition, and craft breweries are spread through the north end of town.

Myrtle Beach mostly feeds crowds, with seafood buffets, pancake houses and chains along the strip. The good meals are a short drive out of town, at the waterfront restaurants of Murrells Inlet. Neither city is a reason to travel for food, but Wilmington rewards a few more evenings.

There is a real gap here. Wilmington has a past you can walk through: blocks of antebellum and Victorian houses under live oaks, the Bellamy Mansion and Burgwin-Wright House telling the story of a slave-holding port, the Cotton Exchange, and the battleship moored across the river. That is two or three days of sightseeing.

Myrtle Beach is a twentieth-century resort with little history to show. Brookgreen Gardens, with its sculpture among the live oaks and its account of the enslaved people who worked the plantation, is genuinely worthwhile, and so is Atalaya nearby. Most visitors are done with both in a day.

The two are level on nightlife, but the scenes are different in character. Myrtle Beach goes out resort-style in summer, with boardwalk bars, entertainment complexes, a few dance clubs that stay open late and some rowdy rally and spring break weeks. In North Myrtle Beach you can also watch the shag, the Carolina beach dance, in old Main Street clubs.

Wilmington is a town night out rather than a resort one. Bars, pubs and rooftop terraces fill Front Street at weekends, helped along by university students, and the beach towns add relaxed bars in summer. There is less clubbing and more drinking and talking.

Myrtle Beach's outdoors are gentle and mostly organised. Huntington Beach State Park is one of the better birdwatching spots on this coast, with herons, ospreys and alligators visible from the marsh boardwalks, and the cypress swamps of the Waccamaw River make a good morning's kayaking. Beyond that, the main outdoor draw is golf, with dozens of courses along the Strand.

Wilmington has more to offer outdoors. You can paddle out to Masonboro, an undeveloped barrier island, or surf and sail off Wrightsville. The trails of Carolina Beach State Park cross pine savanna where the Venus flytrap grows wild, and this coastal corner of the Carolinas is the only place on earth where it does. Neither city has hills, and summer humidity pushes activity into the early morning in both.

The two are fairly even, but the outings differ in kind. From Myrtle Beach the big prize is Charleston, a long day out but one of the finest historic cities in the South, with Georgetown and Pawleys Island as gentler half-days.

Wilmington's outings are smaller and closer to home. You can visit Southport and take the ferry to car-free Bald Head Island, see the Civil War earthworks at Fort Fisher and the colonial ruins of Brunswick Town, or go further north to New Bern and Beaufort. Each city also makes a day out from the other.

Myrtle Beach was built for this. It has resort hotels with kiddie pools and kitchen suites, an amusement park with an old wooden roller coaster, water parks, the observation wheel on the boardwalk and pirate-themed mini-golf on almost every corner. The main thing to avoid with children is spring break weeks.

Wilmington is a pleasant, quieter alternative. The Carolina Beach boardwalk rides, the aquarium at Fort Fisher, the decks of the battleship and the Children's Museum fill a week, and beach rental houses suit families. But there is far less to entertain children than on the Strand.

You will need a car in both places, but Wilmington is easier once you arrive. Its downtown and historic district are compact and flat, and the riverwalk ties them together, so a day of sightseeing needs no driving at all. The beaches are a drive of 15km or more.

In Myrtle Beach almost everything sits along multi-lane highways with few pavements, and Kings Highway clogs in summer. Walking really only works on the boardwalk blocks and along the sand itself.

Neither city is a shopping destination, and what they offer is different. Myrtle Beach is for bargains: two big outlet centres, The Market Common and huge beach shops full of inflatables and swimwear, plus sweetgrass baskets sold along the road to the south.

Wilmington has the browsing. Its independent boutiques, bookshops, galleries and antique dealers line Front Street and fill the old Cotton Exchange.

Myrtle Beach is the cheaper of the two. It has so many motels, hotels and condos that rooms outside the July peak can be remarkably cheap, and the kitchens in many units help with food bills.

Wilmington costs a little more, particularly for summer beach rentals, though its casual seafood and barbecue are fair value. In both places, eating out, attractions and the unavoidable hire car cost what they do anywhere in America, with tax and tips on top.

Wilmington has the deeper arts scene. Thalian Hall, a restored 19th-century opera house, stages local theatre and touring shows, and there is a community symphony, several small companies, outdoor summer stages by Greenfield Lake, and long-running jazz and blues festivals.

Myrtle Beach's entertainment is polished but narrow: big country, gospel and Christmas revues, dinner shows with knights or pirates, and touring acts at the main entertainment complex. It makes a fun evening with the family, but there is no drama or classical music.

Neither city has thermal water or a bathing tradition, so for both, wellness means hotel and day spas. What sets Wilmington slightly apart is its pace. Calm waterfront evenings and a slow small town make it easy to switch off, and there are yoga studios as well.

In Myrtle Beach, the loud summer strip works against rest. Look for it instead around Pawleys Island or in spring and autumn.