Pigeon Forge or Wisconsin Dells?

Neither town is near the sea, but Wisconsin Dells makes more of its lakes. Devil's Lake State Park has proper sandy beaches at both ends of a clear lake below quartzite bluffs. Mirror Lake and Lake Delton have smaller beaches with calm water closer to town. The swimming season runs only from June to early September.

In Pigeon Forge, open-water swimming means the shores of Douglas Lake, a dammed reservoir, or the boulder pools in the park's mountain streams. In both towns, most families end up in the waterparks and hotel pools.

Both towns eat plainly and in large portions, but the regional flavour is different. Pigeon Forge serves Southern comfort food: pancake breakfasts, fried chicken and cobbler buffets, barbecue, and moonshine tastings at the distilleries. Wisconsin Dells has the Midwestern supper club, with relish trays, prime rib and brandy old fashioneds, plus the Friday fish fry and bags of squeaky cheese curds. For a more ambitious meal, you drive to Knoxville or Asheville from one and to Madison from the other.

Neither town has much heritage, and both are built for fun rather than history. Pigeon Forge has the working Old Mill of 1830, which still grinds flour on the river. Its other sights are novelty attractions like the half-scale Titanic. The real history is in the log cabins and churches inside the national park.

In Wisconsin Dells, the stop worth making is the H.H. Bennett Studio. It tells how a photographer's pictures of the gorges first brought visitors here. Broadway's upside-down houses and wax museums are entertaining mid-century kitsch.

Evenings are family time in both towns, and neither has clubs. In Pigeon Forge, the lit-up attraction complexes and go-kart tracks stay busy until about ten, and adults have moonshine tasting rooms and brewpubs. For a livelier bar, most people go to Gatlinburg. Wisconsin Dells goes quiet earlier, once the waterparks close, but it has supper-club bars for a cocktail after dinner and a casino near Baraboo that stays open late. A proper night out there means driving to Madison.

Pigeon Forge is the gateway to real mountains. In the Great Smoky Mountains, forested ridges rise above 2,000m, there are trails to waterfalls and up to Mount LeConte, and black bears are easy to see in Cades Cove. The Appalachian Trail runs along the crest. In spring there are wildflowers, and in October the hardwood forests turn colour.

Wisconsin Dells has lower, gentler country, though there is more to it than you might expect. Kayaks and boats go through the sandstone gorges of the Wisconsin River, and Devil's Lake has bouldery bluff trails and some of the Midwest's best rock climbing. In winter there is cross-country skiing and snowshoeing.

Wisconsin Dells has the better mix of trips within about an hour. You can go to Madison's lakeside Capitol and campus, see Taliesin and the House on the Rock at Spring Green, or visit Circus World and the International Crane Foundation in Baraboo. Milwaukee is a long day out at about two hours.

From Pigeon Forge, the best trip is the furthest one: Asheville and the Biltmore Estate, nearly two hours away. Closer, there are Knoxville's Market Square and theatre district, the craft studios above Gatlinburg, and the Cherokee museum and village across Newfound Gap.

Wisconsin Dells is built more completely for young children. Its indoor waterpark resorts stay open through the winter, many hotels have slides so younger children never need to leave the building, and everything else is only a few minutes' drive away. The drawback is that teenagers can tire of water rides.

Pigeon Forge revolves around Dollywood, with roller coasters, music and seasonal festivals, and its large cabins suit several families travelling together. The difficulty is getting from one attraction to the next, with summer heat and slow traffic along the Parkway at peak times.

You need a car in both towns, but the problems are different. Pigeon Forge is one long multi-lane strip. A trolley runs along it to Gatlinburg, but traffic is slow in summer, in October and over Christmas, and you can only reach the park trailheads by car. Wisconsin Dells has no useful public transport, but its distances are short and seldom jammed, and downtown Broadway is a few blocks you can actually walk. The nearest airport with regular flights is Madison, about an hour away.

Pigeon Forge gives you more to browse. It has large outlet centres towards Sevierville, and around the Old Mill you can buy pottery, quilts and stone-ground cornmeal. The arts and crafts community above Gatlinburg has studios making brooms, baskets, leather and woodwork.

Wisconsin Dells has one outlet centre, which is handy on a wet afternoon, and Broadway's shops sell much the same T-shirts, taffy and cheese. There is no craft scene to go looking for.

Costs are much alike, and in both towns the paid attractions, not the beds, drive up the bill. Pigeon Forge's advantage is the large rental cabin shared between families, which works out cheap per person, along with inexpensive breakfast houses and buffets. In Wisconsin Dells, savings come from the older motels on the strips and from visiting outside summer weekends, when the waterpark resorts cost most. In both places, the state and national parks are cheap days out.

Live shows are a real reason to choose Pigeon Forge. Dozens of theatres along the Parkway put on country and gospel revues, Southern comedy and large dinner shows every night, and Dollywood has bluegrass and Appalachian music on several stages. The tone is broad and sentimental, and for serious theatre you go to Knoxville.

Wisconsin Dells has only a few magic and variety shows and a Lake Delton theatre that hosts touring tribute and country acts. People who care about the stage drive to Spring Green's outdoor classical theatre in summer.

Pigeon Forge finds its calm in the hillside cabins rather than in treatments. Book high up, away from the neon and traffic of the Parkway, and you get a porch, a fireplace and a private hot tub looking out over the wooded ridges. There are only a few day spas in town if you want more than that.

Wisconsin Dells is the other way round. Several of the larger resorts have full-service spas, and a long-established adults-only retreat in the woods lets parents get away for a day or two. Beyond that, the quiet comes early in the morning on the river, or out of season, when the lakes and pine woods are empty.