Bethany Beach or Stowe?

On beaches the two could hardly be further apart. Bethany Beach is built around a broad strip of pale sand with lifeguards on the main stretch and moderate Atlantic surf. Other shores are within half an hour, from the wild dunes of Delaware Seashore State Park to quiet Fenwick Island, and the calm water of the Inland Bays behind the island suits toddlers.

Stowe has no sea at all. Swimming means rocky stream holes or the small, unguarded sandy shores at Waterbury Reservoir and Lake Elmore. They are pleasant on a hot afternoon in July, but nobody chooses the town for them.

Neither is a place to travel for the food, and they differ more in flavour than in range. Bethany eats like the Mid-Atlantic shore: steamed blue crabs on paper at picnic tables, fried clams, boardwalk fries and saltwater taffy. Rehoboth Beach's larger restaurant scene and its breweries are a short drive north.

Stowe relies on Vermont's farms and brewers instead: hazy IPAs from much-sought-after breweries, farm cheddar, maple syrup and cider doughnuts, plus farm-to-table dining rooms and après-ski taverns along Mountain Road. In both places the choice thins out badly outside the main seasons.

Neither town is a sightseeing destination, and an afternoon covers either one. In Bethany that means the carved totem pole, a small collection on the town's beginnings as a church camp and the Second World War watchtowers along the shore.

Stowe's appeal is more about the scenery: a white steeple, a clapboard village and covered bridges below the mountain. It adds a ski museum and the hillside estate of the von Trapp family, so a gentle stroll there has a little more to look at.

Both towns go to bed early, but for different reasons. Bethany calls itself the Quiet Resort, and evenings are spent on the boardwalk with no bar district, so a night out means driving to Dewey Beach or Ocean City.

In Stowe, evenings revolve around après-ski: crowded base-lodge bars, brewery taprooms and the odd band on winter weekends. It is sociable in the peak ski weeks and quiet otherwise, and Burlington is the nearest place for a real night out.

For the outdoors, Stowe is the stronger base by a long way. Mount Mansfield, Vermont's highest peak, gives it ski runs, glades and cross-country trails in winter. In the warmer months there are the Long Trail, the boulder-strewn pass of Smugglers' Notch, waterfalls and well-built mountain-bike trails, and in early October the valley is in full autumn colour.

Bethany's nature is low and gentle: dunes, salt marsh and the shallow Inland Bays for kayaking, paddleboarding, fishing and watching ospreys and herons. Its best outing, to the wild ponies of Assateague Island, makes a lovely day but nothing strenuous, and summer brings heat and mosquitoes.

Bethany has the better spread of outings, mainly because it sits on a coast lined with towns. Historic Lewes with its maritime museum, Victorian Berlin, the resorts of Rehoboth and Ocean City, and the ferry across Delaware Bay to Cape May give you a different day for most of a week.

From Stowe the choices are fewer and further apart: Burlington on Lake Champlain, the excellent Shelburne Museum, the gold-domed statehouse in Montpelier, and the cider mills and breweries of Waterbury. Both lists are pleasant rather than essential.

Bethany makes for the easier family vacation. The beach is guarded, and the town is small and flat enough for children to bike around. The days fill themselves with sand, crabbing and ice cream, with free family concerts at the bandstand and amusement rides a short drive away.

Stowe works best for families who ski or hike together. It has a large ski school, gentle beginner slopes and a resort built around children over Smugglers' Notch, though in winter that resort is about an hour's drive away. Neither town has a zoo or aquarium, but in Stowe every outing means getting in the car.

Bethany is compact and flat. Once you arrive, the car can often stay parked all week while you walk or cycle to the beach and shops, and a seasonal bus links the coast resorts. Day trips and supermarket runs still need a car, and summer weekends clog the coast highway.

Stowe is strung along an 11km valley road between the village and the ski area, so only the village centre and the riverside recreation path really work on foot. The winter shuttle helps skiers, but otherwise a car is essential, and the icy mountain roads call for snow tyres.

Bethany has the edge, though not in the town itself, which offers beach boutiques, surf shops and bookshops. The real draw is the large spread of outlet malls outside Rehoboth Beach, made more attractive by Delaware's lack of sales tax.

Shopping in Stowe is mostly for things made locally: ski and outdoor gear, pottery, woodwork and wool from the craft shops, and maple syrup and cheddar to take home. It has nothing to match the outlets.

Both are expensive, but Stowe more so. Bethany's beach-house rentals are steep in July and August, yet self-catering, free beach access and no sales tax keep a week's costs under control, and June and September are noticeably cheaper.

Stowe prices its lodging as one of the best-known ski resorts in the East, and lift tickets, ski rental and resort dining add up quickly on top. Christmas, the school breaks and the foliage weeks are the dearest. Summer and the quiet shoulder months ease the bill, and valley motels and free trails help a careful budget.

Stowe has the fuller programme of the two. A performing arts centre at Spruce Peak books touring musicians, comedy and family shows, a community company stages summer theatre, and concerts on the hillside lawns carry on the von Trapp family's musical legacy.

In Bethany, live performance means the bandstand by the boardwalk, where on summer evenings families sit on blankets for free concerts by cover bands and brass groups. It is charming, but for anything more you have to go to Rehoboth's small community theatre.

Stowe suits a restful weekend in a way Bethany does not. Its larger resorts have full spas with saunas, steam rooms and heated outdoor pools, at their best when snow is falling on the mountain, and quiet inns with wood fires do the rest.

Bethany has only a few day spas, so rest there comes from the pace itself: leafy residential streets, the sound of surf along an empty boardwalk, and near silence in spring and autumn.