Gatlinburg or St. Louis?

Neither city is a beach destination, and both lie hundreds of kilometres from any coast. What you get instead is different. In Gatlinburg you can tube and wade in the cold, clear rivers of the national park or swim at Douglas Lake. In St. Louis the Mississippi and Missouri are working rivers far too strong to swim in, so cooling off means a pool or a long drive to an Ozark reservoir.

St. Louis is the better place to eat. It has dishes of its own, such as toasted ravioli, Provel-topped thin-crust pizza and gooey butter cake, along with serious rib barbecue, Italian trattorias on the Hill and Bosnian, Vietnamese and Ethiopian cooking on South Grand. The brewing heritage in Soulard and the Saturday market add to it.

Gatlinburg feeds a resort crowd. Expect pancake breakfasts, barbecue, fudge and moonshine tastings on the Parkway. Proper Appalachian cooking, like trout, country ham and stack cake, turns up only in the odd restaurant.

St. Louis has real sightseeing. There is the Gateway Arch with its museum of westward expansion, the Old Courthouse of the Dred Scott case, and free collections in Forest Park. The Wainwright Building and whole streets of red-brick housing in Soulard and Lafayette Square fill two or three days.

Gatlinburg's landmarks are an observation tower and mountaintop amusement parks. Its heritage lives in the working studios of the Arts and Crafts Community and in the old cabins, mills and churches of Cades Cove and the Roaring Fork, which you visit as outings into the park.

St. Louis gives you an evening out, though it is spread over separate areas. There are corner taverns and blues bars in Soulard, dance bars on Washington Avenue, the Grove's late LGBTQ+ strip and student haunts on the Delmar Loop, with a taxi often needed in between.

In Gatlinburg the evening means a stroll along the lit Parkway, a moonshine tasting and perhaps a brewery terrace. The strip empties by late night, and most people end up back in the cabin hot tub.

Gatlinburg wins easily. The town is the gateway to the Great Smoky Mountains, and within minutes you are in deep hardwood forest. Trails range from Laurel Falls to the climb up Mount LeConte, and the road runs up to Clingmans Dome at close to 2,025m. Bears, deer and elk are part of the experience, alongside rafting on the Pigeon River. Weekend and leaf-season traffic is the price.

St. Louis has the big woods and lakes of Forest Park and, within an hour, the river bluffs and caves of Castlewood and Meramec. The landscape rolls rather than soars, though wintering bald eagles near Alton are a real draw.

Both have a good handful of outings, but of a different kind, and both need a car. From Gatlinburg the best trips are scenic: over Newfound Gap to Cherokee and its museum of the Eastern Band, on to Bryson City's heritage railway, or to Asheville and the Biltmore Estate.

From St. Louis the outings lean towards history. Cahokia Mounds, the UNESCO-listed remains of a pre-Columbian city, is twenty minutes away. Further afield are the French colonial houses of Ste. Genevieve, the German wine towns of Hermann and Augusta, Mark Twain's Hannibal and Lincoln's Springfield.

Gatlinburg is the more complete family vacation. The Parkway is a strip of aquarium, mirror mazes, alpine coasters and chairlift parks, with Dollywood a short drive away and junior ranger walks in the national park. Expect high-season queues and crawling traffic.

St. Louis comes close with fewer crowds. The climbable City Museum is a highlight, and the zoo and Science Center in Forest Park are free. There is also the Magic House, the tram pods up the Arch and an easy evening of baseball at Busch Stadium, though the attractions are spread out.

You will want a car in both, but for different reasons. Gatlinburg's Parkway strip is walkable and a trolley loops out to Pigeon Forge. The hillside cabins, trailheads and park roads all need a car, though, and at busy times those roads can stall for long stretches.

St. Louis is spread out. The MetroLink light rail covers a few key routes, from the airport through the Central West End and Forest Park to downtown, with a branch to Clayton. Soulard, the Hill and South Grand need a car or taxi, but parking is easy and the roads are mostly clear.

Shopping is a side pleasure in both, but the pleasures differ. In Gatlinburg the souvenir and candy shops of the Parkway matter less than the artisans' loop, where quilts, pottery, brooms and woodwork come straight from the studio. There are outlet malls nearby for brands.

St. Louis offers urban browsing instead: antiques, vintage and records on Cherokee Street, independent shops on the Loop and boutiques in the Central West End. Fashion labels are out in the suburban malls.

Overall costs are similar, but the money goes in different places. In Gatlinburg, a shared cabin or an older motel can be good value and the national park costs little. The paid Parkway attractions and Dollywood add up quickly for a family, and rates jump in leaf season, at Thanksgiving and over Christmas and New Year.

In St. Louis, hotels cost less than in the coastal cities, and the zoo and the Forest Park museums are free. The extra cost is a hire car, or taxis between neighbourhoods.

St. Louis is far stronger here. It has a symphony founded in 1880 playing in Powell Hall and touring Broadway at the Fabulous Fox. In summer there are open-air musicals at the Muny and the Opera Theatre's festival season. On top of that is a blues lineage running through Chuck Berry and W.C. Handy, still heard in Soulard's bars.

Gatlinburg's live entertainment is bluegrass in the tasting rooms, mountain music at Dollywood and dinner shows in Pigeon Forge. That is fun for families, but there is no orchestra or serious theatre.

Neither has a spa tradition, but Gatlinburg is easier to unwind in if you stay up the hillsides. A secluded cabin with a hot tub, quiet nights and mist on the ridges does the work that spas do elsewhere. Avoid the noisy Parkway.

St. Louis is unhurried and rarely crowded. A slow morning in Forest Park or the Japanese garden at the Missouri Botanical Garden is the most restful thing it offers.