Kuala Lumpur or Kuching?

Neither city is a beach destination, but Kuching gets you to sand more easily. Damai and Santubong are about forty minutes away, and the beaches there are pleasant, backed by jungle and the peak of Mount Santubong. The sea is often cloudy, though, and rough in the monsoon.

Kuala Lumpur's nearest real beach is Port Dickson, about an hour and a half away, with ordinary sand. Anyone wanting proper beaches from there usually flies on to Langkawi or Penang, so the rooftop hotel pool does most of the work.

Kuala Lumpur has the wider table. Malay, Cantonese and Hokkien, and South Indian cooking all run at full strength, alongside mamak canteens that stay open all night. Jalan Alor, Brickfields and Kampung Baru each feel different, and there is a polished restaurant tier when you want one.

Kuching's case is that you won't find its food elsewhere. Sarawak laksa and kolo mee for breakfast, Dayak midin fern and chicken cooked in bamboo, and riverside seafood sold by weight are well worth the trip. The range is narrower, though, and serious fine dining is scarce.

Kuala Lumpur has more to fill the days and bigger landmarks to see. The Petronas Towers skybridge, the British-era buildings around Merdeka Square, the Islamic Arts Museum in the Lake Gardens and the climb to Batu Caves add up to a solid two or three days.

Kuching's heritage is smaller and more unusual: the riverbanks the Brooke Rajahs left behind, with Fort Margherita and the Astana facing the Old Court House, plus the Borneo Cultures Museum for the island's peoples. It is a charming two-day loop on foot, but it has no landmarks on Kuala Lumpur's scale.

Kuala Lumpur is the place for a night out. Changkat Bukit Bintang stays busy late at weekends, the rooftop bars look onto the Petronas Towers, and there are proper clubs for dancing into the small hours.

In Kuching, evenings usually mean dinner, a walk along the lit waterfront and perhaps a live-band lounge on Jalan Padungan. It is friendly but finishes early, so anyone after a big night will be disappointed.

Kuching is one of the easiest places in Asia to see Borneo's wildlife from a city base. Semenggoh's orangutans are half an hour away. Bako, across the estuary by boat, has proboscis monkeys, bearded pigs and sandstone cliffs, while Kubah, Gunung Gading's rafflesia flowers and the Bau caves add more.

Kuala Lumpur does better than most capitals, with the canopy walkway near the KL Tower, the Forest Research Institute trails and birdwatching at Fraser's Hill. Even so, its wilder parks need an overnight trip, and nothing nearby compares with Bako.

Kuala Lumpur has the stronger day trips because of Malacca, a UNESCO-listed old port two hours south with Dutch and Portuguese buildings and Peranakan cooking. Putrajaya, royal Klang and Kuala Selangor make shorter outings.

Kuching's excursions are mostly to its national parks. Its cultural outings are smaller: the longhouses of the Sarawak Cultural Village, the Bidayuh community at Annah Rais and the old mining town of Bau. These make good half days, but there is no historic city within reach.

With children, the gap is between a city full of attractions and a town built around wild animals. In Kuala Lumpur you can spend a morning in the shark tunnel of the aquarium below the Petronas Towers, cool off in the free splash area next door, then try the walk-in bird park in the Lake Gardens or the water park at Sunway. The food bends easily to young tastes, though heat and broken pavements mean most families take taxis.

Kuching offers fewer things to do, but some of them children remember for years. Orangutans swing in at Semenggoh, the Sarawak Cultural Village has dancing and longhouses to climb into, and the cat museum is a playful extra. There is no aquarium or theme park, and Bako's boat ride and rough trails suit older children best.

Trains make the difference. In Kuala Lumpur the LRT, MRT, the Bukit Bintang monorail and the airport express link most districts you will want, though the lines were built separately and changes can mean long, confusing walks between them. The covered walkway from the Petronas Towers to Bukit Bintang helps in the heat.

Kuching has no rail at all, but it barely needs it in the centre, where the waterfront, Main Bazaar and the museums are a short walk apart and a sampan crosses the river in moments. Further out, the buses are hard to work out, and Bako, Semenggoh and the beaches mean a driver, a taxi or a tour.

Kuala Lumpur is a serious shopping city. Bukit Bintang's huge malls run from luxury flagships to electronics floors, Mid Valley and Bangsar add more, and Central Market's Art Deco hall sells batik, songket and pewter.

Kuching has no designer shopping, but it does have Borneo crafts you won't easily find elsewhere. Main Bazaar sells pua kumbu weaving, rattan and beadwork, which are worth inspecting closely, and the Satok weekend market is the place for jungle produce. Pepper and kek lapis make easy gifts.

Both are cheap places to travel, and in both alcohol is the cost that catches people out. The difference is where the money goes. Kuala Lumpur gives unusual hotel quality for the price, with international chains and rooftop pools, and its trains make getting around almost free.

In Kuching, daily life costs even less, but the boats to Bako, private drivers and guided tours add up, especially for someone travelling alone.

Kuala Lumpur has something on through the year, and Kuching mostly has one big weekend. The Malaysian Philharmonic plays a regular season in its intimate shoebox hall inside the twin towers, which makes the best evening out. Istana Budaya puts on large musicals and traditional productions, Sentul West has smaller theatre and dance, and there is jazz in a few bars in Bangsar and Changkat.

Kuching's draw is the Rainforest World Music Festival, which brings musicians from around the world to the foot of Mount Santubong each year and is worth planning a visit around. The rest of the year there are dance shows at the cultural village, an occasional sape recital and cover bands, but no theatre or classical season.

Both cities rely on massage rather than any bathing tradition, so the difference lies in the setting. Kuala Lumpur has more choice, with the reflexology parlours of Bukit Bintang, Malay herbal treatments in hotel spas and a few hammams, but you return from them to traffic and heat.

Kuching has fewer options, but the town itself is slower. Its resort spas at Damai sit between jungle and sea, and an evening walk along the river is restful in a way Kuala Lumpur rarely is.