Darjeeling or Kathmandu?

Neither city has anywhere to swim. Both sit high in the Himalaya, far from any sea, and their rivers are cold and fast. The only small difference is that Kathmandu's rivers are used for rafting a few hours out and its hotels have pools, while Darjeeling's valley rivers below the ridge are left alone.

Kathmandu has more to eat. Newari cooking gives it a cuisine of its own: buffalo choila, bara lentil pancakes, yomari dumplings and rice beer in the old bazaars and in Patan and Kirtipur. Add Tibetan dishes around Boudhanath and a long, if uneven, tourist menu in Thamel.

Darjeeling shares the momos and thukpa, but its range is narrower. Its real strength is tea: tasting first and second flush muscatel in a tea room on the Mall or on an estate, followed by long breakfasts in the old colonial bakeries.

Here Kathmandu is in a different league. Durbar Square with the Kumari's house, Swayambhunath above the valley, Boudhanath circled by pilgrims at dusk, open cremations at Pashupatinath, and Patan's finer square and museum make a living religious city. It rewards days of wandering through Asan and Indra Chowk.

Darjeeling's heritage is smaller and gentler. It has the UNESCO-listed toy train looping round Batasia to Ghoom monastery, St Andrew's Church, Observatory Hill and the Everest story at the Himalayan Mountaineering Institute, all comfortably seen in two or three days.

Neither is a place for late nights, but Kathmandu at least has Thamel. Its rooftop bars, pool halls and few clubs fill with trekkers celebrating a finished route until around midnight. In Darjeeling, going out means a drink by the fire in an old pub or hotel bar. By ten the streets are cold and empty, and most visitors are in bed early for a dawn start.

Darjeeling puts the mountains right in front of you. Kangchenjunga fills the sky from the town itself, and Tiger Hill can show a line of peaks reaching to Everest. Tea terraces and oak and rhododendron forest begin at the edge of town, and the Singalila Ridge to Sandakphu, with its red pandas, is a great multi-day walk.

From Kathmandu the snow peaks sit behind the valley rim, so a sunrise view means a trip to Nagarkot or Dhulikhel. Its strengths lie further out: the forest trails of Shivapuri, mountain flights to Everest, rafting rivers and the treks to Langtang and beyond.

Kathmandu has the one outing that clearly stands out. Bhaktapur is a royal town of brick squares, five-tiered temples and potters working in the street, and it pairs easily with the carving at Changu Narayan. The woodcarving villages of Bungamati and Khokana are also within reach.

Darjeeling's outings are to hill towns much like itself: the schools and estates of Kurseong, the lake at Mirik and a long, winding day to Kalimpong. They are pleasant, but none gives the change of scene that Bhaktapur does.

Darjeeling gives children more to do. There is the toy train, a zoo with red pandas, snow leopards and Himalayan wolves, and the ropeway and pony rides, all in cool air. The steps, narrow roads and car-sick drive up from the plains still make it better for older children.

Kathmandu has the monkeys at Swayambhunath and the prayer wheels at Boudhanath, but beyond a small zoo there is little made for children. Traffic, dust, winter air and the care needed with food make it hard going with young ones.

Both cities are hard work, Darjeeling slightly less so. Its centre at Chowrasta and the Mall is a car-free ridge for strolling, and shared jeeps and taxis cover the rest. Steep steps and peak-season jams test your legs and patience, and the drive up from the plains takes three hours or more.

Kathmandu's old city and Thamel are walkable, but you share the lanes with motorbikes. Reaching Patan, Boudhanath or the airport by taxi or ride-hailing motorbike can take far longer than the distance suggests.

Kathmandu has the wider range of crafts. Thamel has pashmina, felt and trekking gear, Boudhanath has carpets and thangkas, and Patan's own workshops sell cast bronze statues. Bargaining is expected.

In Darjeeling the best thing to buy is tea, tasted and sold by weight along the Mall and Nehru Road. The Tibetan Refugee Self Help Centre adds carpets and thangkas, but the stalls beyond it repeat each other.

Both are very cheap, and Kathmandu is cheaper still. Comfortable guesthouses in Thamel and Boudhanath, plates of dal bhat and bargained taxis cost little. The money goes on entry fees at the Durbar Squares, Pashupatinath and Bhaktapur, and on treks and mountain flights.

In Darjeeling the bills grow with heritage hotels, tea-estate bungalows and private taxis to Tiger Hill. Rooms with a mountain view also cost more in the peak seasons and during Indian school vacations.

Kathmandu has more to hear. Bands play rock covers and Nepali folk in Thamel most nights, and there are cultural dinner shows, temple singing in the evening, masked dances at Indra Jatra and an autumn jazz festival. Darjeeling has no regular venue at all, so seeing a performance means catching the cham dances at a monastery festival such as Losar, or an occasional evening of Nepali and Lepcha music.

Neither has spas or a bathing culture, and in both you find calm by leaving the busy centre. The difference is in kind. Darjeeling restores you through its setting: a tea-estate bungalow, mountain mornings and cool air. Kathmandu is a place to learn, with meditation courses at Kopan and other monasteries near Boudhanath, yoga, Ayurveda and cheap massage on every Thamel lane.