Matera or Milan?

Neither city is on the coast, but Matera is closer to proper sand. The Ionian shore at Metaponto and Policoro is about 45 minutes away by car, with wide sandy beaches backed by pine woods and calm, shallow water that suits small children. Without a car, though, it is very hard to get there.

In Milan, swimming means pools or lakes. Locals use the Idroscalo basin and the open-air pools, and Lake Como and Lake Maggiore are about an hour away by train, with pebbly lidos and cooler water. The sea in Liguria is too far for an afternoon.

Matera's cooking is honest and narrow: the horn-shaped durum loaf, crapiata, fave e cicoria, crackling peperoni cruschi and a glass of Aglianico, often eaten in a cave room in the Sassi. It is worth tasting, but after a few meals there is little else on offer.

Milan has more depth. Saffron risotto, ossobuco and cotoletta sit alongside good Neapolitan pizza, Sicilian pastry and serious fine dining, and historic pasticcerie set the daytime rhythm. Early-evening aperitivo in Brera, Isola or on the Navigli is a reason to come in itself.

Matera has one great sight, and nowhere in Italy is quite like it. The cave houses and rock churches of the Sassi have faded Byzantine frescoes, and you can walk through the Palombaro Lungo cistern, all spread across a ravine that people have lived in since prehistoric times. It is a place to wander and take in, rather than a place of great collections.

Milan has more art of the highest rank. The rooftop of the Duomo, Leonardo's Last Supper, the paintings at the Brera and Michelangelo's Rondanini Pietà at the Castello Sforzesco add up to several days of major sights. They are scattered across a modern business city, but there is more of them.

In Matera, a night out means the passeggiata on Via del Corso, a long dinner and wine on a terrace looking across the lit Sassi. A few cave bars stay open later in summer, but there are no clubs.

Milan has a real night scene. Bars spill onto the canal towpaths of the Navigli, Porta Venezia mixes a relaxed crowd with the city's gay scene, and evenings run on to dressy clubs around Corso Como or warehouse nights on the city's edge. The city empties in August, though.

These two are about level, but the landscapes are very different. In Matera the wild country starts at the edge of town: a path drops from Sasso Caveoso into the Gravina gorge and climbs to Murgia Timone, past abandoned rock churches and Neolithic sites, with kestrels in the cliffs. The Lucanian Dolomites are a drive away.

Milan itself is flat and hazy, and its greenery is limited to parks and canal towpaths. An hour away by train, though, are steep wooded lakeshores, sailing, ridge hikes and via ferrata in the Grigne, and skiing in winter.

Both cities make good bases, but Milan is easier and offers more. Fast trains reach Verona, Turin, Bergamo and the villages of Lake Como in about an hour, Bologna and Lugano are not much further, and boats run out to the Borromean Islands, all without a car.

Matera's day trips are also excellent: Alberobello, Ostuni and the Valle d'Itria, Castel del Monte, the ghost town of Craco and the mountain villages of Castelmezzano. But you need a car for almost all of them.

Milan is the easier city with children. The science and technology museum has a submarine and hands-on labs, Parco Sempione has playgrounds and the aquarium, the flat centre and the trams are easy with a pushchair, and Gardaland is within reach.

Older children will enjoy Matera's caves, the underground cistern and the climb into the gorge. But the Sassi are steep, uneven steps with little summer shade, so bring a baby carrier rather than a pushchair and keep the stay short.

Getting around is much simpler in Milan. Five easy metro lines, a dense tram network and direct trains to the lakes mean you never need a car. The main drawbacks are hot metro platforms in summer and the long ride in from Malpensa.

Matera is easy on foot, although the stairways down into the Sassi tire the legs. Leaving town is the problem: the city is off the national rail network, a slow narrow-gauge line runs to Bari and buses are infrequent, so a hire car makes a real difference.

This is where the two differ most. Milan is a world fashion capital, with flagship stores around Via Montenapoleone, old shops under the Galleria's glass roof, design showrooms, vintage shops in Brera and Porta Ticinese, and antique markets along the Navigli.

Matera's shopping fits in an afternoon: painted cuccù whistles, small tufa carvings of the town and ordinary high-street shops. The best things to take home are its food and wine.

Matera is clearly the cheaper of the two. Upper-town trattorias and guesthouses a few minutes' walk from the old districts cost little, and the gorge and the Sassi lanes are free. Staying in a cave hotel in the Sassi is the one real expense.

Milan is Italy's most expensive city, and hotel rooms are hard to find at fair rates during trade fairs and fashion weeks. You can save by making an aperitivo spread your supper, eating office-worker set lunches and staying near a metro stop outside the centre.

Milan is one of Europe's great cities for performance. La Scala's season opens each December on the feast of Sant'Ambrogio. The Piccolo Teatro, a fine symphony orchestra at the Auditorium and summer concerts at San Siro add to it, and gallery seats at La Scala are a realistic aim.

Matera has conservatory concerts, a summer jazz festival with the Sassi as a backdrop, and the procession and float-wrecking of the Festa della Bruna. On most evenings, the entertainment is the view.

Milan has more ways to unwind. A thermal spa complex south of the centre has outdoor pools and saunas, the restored 1930s Bagni Misteriosi open in summer, and the lakeside villas are an hour away.

Matera has no thermal baths, only hotel spas, some with pools cut into the rock in candlelit caves. Its calm comes from the pace of the town: quiet early mornings in the Sassi and slow evenings over the gorge, which are at their best outside summer.