Pattaya

The sea here is warm all year, usually around 28-30°C, and the beach is part of almost every stay. The water along Pattaya Beach itself is cloudy and busy with speedboats, jet skis and parasailing, so most people use the sand there for strolling and deckchairs rather than swimming. Jomtien, just south, is longer, calmer and better for a swim, and Na Jomtien and the beaches beyond get quieter still.

For clear water, visitors take the ferry to Koh Larn, about 45 minutes from Bali Hai pier, where Tien, Samae and Nual beaches have pale sand and properly swimmable sea. Weekends there can be crowded with day trippers. The wettest months bring rougher water and more litter washed in.

Thai food is the reason to eat well here: grilled seafood along the Naklua waterfront and at the fishing villages to the south, som tam and grilled pork from street carts, and evening night markets with long rows of stalls. The seafood is the local strength, bought by weight and cooked to order.

The central strip is heavy on tourist fare, with menus pitched at long-stay Europeans, Russians, Indians and Chinese, so pizza, schnitzel and English breakfasts are as easy to find as curry. That breadth helps homesick travellers, but the quality is uneven and fine dining is limited to a few resort restaurants. Eat where Thai families eat, away from Beach Road, for the best meals.

Pattaya grew from a fishing village into a resort, so it has almost no historic architecture. The one sight of real quality is the Sanctuary of Truth, a huge carved teak temple-palace on the shore at Naklua, covered inside and out with Hindu and Buddhist figures. Big Buddha Hill, with its golden statue above the bay, and Wat Yansangwararam south of town add some religious interest.

Beyond those, the attractions are entertainment: 3D illusion galleries, wax and oddity museums and replica floating markets. There is no serious museum of Thai history or art and no old quarter to wander, so a visitor drawn by heritage will see what matters here in a day or two.

Going out is what Pattaya is best known for. Walking Street, closed to traffic at night, is a neon strip of clubs, go-go bars and live-band bars that stays busy into the small hours, and the sois off Second Road hold hundreds of open-fronted beer bars. The sex industry is a visible part of much of this, and the city's reputation rests on it.

There is more besides: big dance clubs, rooftop bars over the bay, beach bars in Jomtien and a gay quarter at Boyztown. Nights run late and cheaply. Couples and travellers who want a quieter evening tend to stay in Jomtien or Naklua and pick their bars with care.

The outdoors here is mostly on the water. Boats run to Koh Larn, Koh Sak and Koh Phai for snorkelling, and dive trips go out to coral patches and sunken naval ships off the coast. The steady winds at Na Jomtien make it a kitesurfing spot in the dry season.

On land there is less: the hinterland is flat, hot and built up, and walking means the short hill paths to the viewpoints over the bay or the botanical gardens at Nong Nooch. The forested hills of the Khao Kheow area are a short drive inland. Heat and humidity rule out much of the day for exertion.

The big outing is Bangkok, about two hours by road, with its royal palace, riverside temples and markets, though the traffic can stretch the journey and it makes a long day. Closer at hand, Si Racha is a working fishing town with a ferry to Koh Si Chang, a small island with an old royal summer palace. Bang Saen is the beach resort where Thai families go at weekends.

To the east, Koh Samet's white beaches are reached by road and a short ferry from Ban Phe, about two hours in all. Beyond these the list thins quickly: the old capital at Ayutthaya and the gem town of Chanthaburi are too far for a comfortable day.

Pattaya has more aimed at children than its reputation suggests. Several large water parks sit on the edges of town, there is an aquarium with a walk-through tunnel, and the Khao Kheow Open Zoo, with its night safari, is a short drive inland. Nong Nooch's gardens put on elephant and cultural shows, and Thai staff are warm with children everywhere.

Families usually base themselves in Jomtien or at resorts with big pools, away from central Pattaya, where the bar streets and go-go bars are hard to avoid after dark. Heat, traffic and broken pavements make walking with pushchairs tiring.

There is no metro or tram. Instead, shared pick-up trucks called songthaews circle the main loop of Beach Road and Second Road and run out to Jomtien and Naklua; you flag one down and press a buzzer to get off. They work well along the coast and are simple once understood.

Off those routes it is ride-hailing apps, metered taxis, motorbike taxis or a hired scooter. The pavements are narrow, broken and often blocked, traffic is heavy, and the heat makes walking long distances hard. The water parks, zoo, gardens and viewpoints all need a car or taxi.

Shopping is mostly in big air-conditioned malls along Beach Road and Second Road, holding international chains, cinemas and supermarkets, plus a cluster of themed shopping centres. In the evenings, the night markets around Thepprasit and Jomtien sell clothes, souvenirs, phone cases and snacks, often branded copies.

Tailor shops will make suits and shirts within days, and there are stalls selling Thai silk and handicrafts. What the town lacks is depth: there are few luxury boutiques, little independent design and not much genuine local craftsmanship among the souvenirs, so shopping here is practical and cheap rather than a reason to come.

Pattaya is a cheap place for a beach vacation. A huge oversupply of rooms keeps hotels and guesthouses low-priced, especially in the wet season, and condos rent by the week or month. Street food, local restaurants, beer bars, massages and the shared songthaew rides cost little by any Western standard.

Costs rise at beachfront resorts, imported Western food and drinks in the busier bars, speedboat island trips and the water parks and shows, where foreigners often pay more than Thais. Agree a price before getting on a jet ski or into an unmetered taxi.

The signature show here is ladyboy cabaret, staged in big theatres with sequins, lip-synced numbers and elaborate costumes, performed nightly for coach parties and couples alike. Several dinner shows feature Thai dance and martial arts.

Live music means cover bands in the bars along Walking Street and in Jomtien, playing rock and pop standards until late, plus an outdoor music festival on the seafront in some years. There is no theatre, opera or classical season to speak of, and no jazz or original-music scene of note, so the performances on offer are entertainment staged for visitors rather than a local arts life.

Thai massage is everywhere, from simple shophouse parlours with foot-massage chairs on the street to proper day spas with herbal compresses and oil treatments. Choose carefully, as some places offering massage are part of the nightlife trade. The large resorts in Naklua, Na Jomtien and on the Pratamnak headland have full spas, pools and gardens built for rest.

Central Pattaya is noisy, crowded and loud late into the night, so a restful stay depends on where you sleep. There are yoga and fitness retreats, but no bathing or hot-spring tradition.