Tokyo or Bangkok?

Neither city is built for a beach trip, but Tokyo makes a swim much easier. About an hour on the train takes you to the dark volcanic sand of Kamakura's Yuigahama, Zushi or Enoshima. The water is pleasant in July and August, though summer weekends get crowded.

Bangkok's own coastline is mudflat and mangrove, so swimming in the city means the hotel pool, often on a rooftop. Bang Saen and Pattaya have warm water all year, but they are a long day out by road. Most visitors who want sand add a few nights on the islands or in Hua Hin instead.

Both cities rank among the best places in the world to eat, and the difference is one of style. Bangkok's food is out in the open and runs late: Yaowarat Road turns into a long kitchen after dark, som tam is pounded to order, and curries are served from pots at shophouse counters, usually with a lot of chilli.

Tokyo's food is about specialists and precision. Small counters perfect one dish over decades, the depachika halls sell beautiful prepared food, and the city has more Michelin stars than anywhere else. Sake, whisky and pour-over coffee are taken just as seriously. Choose Bangkok for spice and street grazing, Tokyo for refinement and endless variety.

The two cities are close here, but you see them in different ways. Bangkok's highlights are grouped together on Rattanakosin Island and along the river: the gilded Grand Palace, Wat Pho's Reclining Buddha and the porcelain tiers of Wat Arun, with worship going on around visitors. It has fewer museums than temples.

Tokyo lost most of its old fabric in 1923 and 1945, so its heritage is spread out: Senso-ji, Meiji Jingu and the lanes of Yanaka. Its strength is the museums. Ueno Park alone holds the Tokyo National Museum and the National Museum of Western Art, and the modern architecture is worth seeing in its own right.

Both are first-rate nights out, built differently. Bangkok offers separate scenes to choose from: polished cocktail bars in Thonglor and Ekkamai, backpacker noise on Khao San Road, the gay scene in Silom and rooftop bars high above the skyline. Most places close around two.

Tokyo's typical night is spent in tiny bars, such as the two hundred crammed into Golden Gai or the whisky and vinyl rooms stacked above the streets. The clubs in Shibuya and Roppongi run until dawn. The last train around midnight decides whether you go home early or stay out all night.

Tokyo is far better for getting outdoors. Mount Takao is a forest hike about an hour away by train, the Okutama valleys inside Tokyo's own borders have gorges and cedar ridges, and Hakone and the Fuji Five Lakes give the classic views of Fuji. Cherry blossom and the November colours bring the city parks to life.

Bangkok is flat delta, and inside the city the outdoors means early runs in Lumphini Park or cycling the raised paths of Bang Krachao. Khao Yai and Kanchanaburi have real wild country, but they are overnight trips, and the heat makes long midday activity hard.

Bangkok has one outstanding day trip: the ruined temples of Ayutthaya, best explored by bicycle. The canal country to the southwest adds the floating markets and the Maeklong railway market. Kanchanaburi's Death Railway bridge is a long day, and after that the choice runs out.

Tokyo's rail network gives it many more options, and each one is easier. Kamakura's Great Buddha and Zen temples are an hour south, Nikko's Toshogu is about two hours north, Yokohama is under half an hour away, and Kawagoe, Sawara, Hakone and Karuizawa follow. You could spend a week on day trips without repeating yourself.

Tokyo is one of the easiest big cities anywhere to visit with children. The attractions are excellent, from DisneySea to the Ueno Zoo, but the real advantage is everyday comfort: spotless toilets, lifts in the stations, safe streets and food that suits fussy eaters.

Bangkok makes a warm fuss of children and has plenty for them, including Sea Life under Siam Paragon, Safari World and the mall play areas. The difficulty is the city itself. Heat, blocked pavements that buggies cannot handle and slow traffic mean families need short days planned around a hotel pool.

There is no contest here. Tokyo has the densest rail network in the world, trains run to the minute, one card pays for everything, and almost every sight is a short walk from a station through quiet backstreets. The only drawbacks are the crowded rush hour and the first-day confusion of Shinjuku station.

Bangkok's Skytrain, MRT and river boats are clean and easy, but they barely reach the old city. Between stations you face some of the slowest traffic anywhere and pavements that make walking hard work. It works best if you base each day around a single station or pier.

Bangkok is a strong shopping city. Chatuchak Weekend Market fills a morning, the malls around Siam are linked by Skytrain walkways, and Thai silk, celadon and benjarong make good things to take home. Bargaining at market stalls is part of the fun.

Tokyo goes much further. Ginza's department stores, the vintage shops of Harajuku and Shimokitazawa, and whole districts given over to one thing, such as knives on Kappabashi, books in Jimbocho and anime in Akihabara, give it a depth few cities match. The lacquer, washi and indigo craft goods are of real quality, and every purchase is wrapped with care.

Bangkok makes a budget last much longer. Meals, taxis and massages cost little, and a riverside or rooftop-pool hotel is affordable. Costs rise mainly for imported drink, rooftop bars and the Grand Palace entry.

Tokyo is cheaper than its reputation for food, trains and the many free shrines and gardens. The room is what drives the cost up: central hotels are small and not cheap, and prices jump in cherry-blossom season and Golden Week.

Tokyo has the far richer stage. At the Kabuki-za you can buy a ticket for a single act, and there are Noh theatres, the Takarazuka Revue, several orchestras including the NHK Symphony, and opera at the New National Theatre. Hundreds of live houses in Koenji and Shimokitazawa host bands every night.

Bangkok's highlight is khon, the masked Ramakien drama staged near the Grand Palace. Beyond that you will mostly find small jazz bars and hotel cover bands. A night at a Muay Thai stadium, with its ritual and music, is the more memorable show.

In Bangkok you unwind on a massage table, and in Tokyo in a hot bath. Bangkok's massage tradition starts at Wat Pho, where the school still teaches inside the temple grounds, and runs through late-opening shopfront parlours to the long herbal rituals of the grand hotel spas. Calm is what the city lacks, so rest comes in short breaks from the heat and traffic.

Tokyo's equivalent is bathing. There are neighbourhood sento with painted Fuji murals, large sauna complexes where people spend the whole afternoon, and traditional onsen inns in Hakone. Gardens and temple grounds give the city quiet corners as well. Many baths still turn away guests with tattoos, so check before you go.